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Mom, I Need You to be Weak

Mom, I Need You to be Weak

By:  Amazing Nation Guest Writer May 7, 2021
#AmazingNation, #Hope, #love, #Suffering, #youreamazing


I feel guilty for feeling this way, but I just wish that you saw my efforts. I’ve been picking up a lot of slack lately, and I know it’s because you and Emma (younger sibling) have been sick, but I wish for a moment that you’d look at me and see that I’m doing my best to help.

You’re frustrated with me and my siblings when we bicker and fight, and I am too. I’m trying to be perfect and not show my overwhelmed emotions, but inside I’m so stressed and I sometimes snap on the kids.

"As an older daughter, I want to set a good example, and that pressure is a lot to handle."

All of the work I’m doing around the house is really taxing. I help out with a cheerful attitude and do the things I know you can’t do because you’re at doctor appointments and testing. I don’t mind grocery shopping, cooking or cleaning if it helps you to feel better and less stressed.

I’m jealous sometimes of Emma. I’m jealous of the time that she gets to spend with you and the attention that she gets. I get frustrated with her, and I even told her she was faking. I think I’m an awful person for feeling that way, but I really want you to love me too.

"The last thing I want you to do is to feel bad for how things are, I know you can’t help it." 

I know you’re doing your best, but I just want to cry with you and let you know that I’m hurting. I don’t want you to feel bad, I just want to be real with you and for you to say, “I know, we’re going to get through this together.”

I guess I just want to be asked how I’m doing with all of this, and to be seen. I don’t care that you can’t do everything around the house or take me to all the places I want to go. I just want to be loved and for you give your heart to me. I don’t need you to always be strong, I need you to be weak. Because then I feel like I can be a little weak too.

You aren’t great because you do everything for me or can solve all of my problems. "You are great because you’re my mom, and God gave you to me." To care for my spirit and emotions as well as my physical being. You do more for me by gently asking how I am, then by any gift or service you physically give.

I hope you know that I don’t blame you for what’s going on with you, and I hope you don’t blame me for my attitude or frustrations with you and the kids. I wanted to write this letter so that you would know where I’m at. That I’m not mad at you. All I want to do is to love you and be loved by you, and not let this mess that is going on in our family get in the way of that. I’m not the best at expressing my emotions, so I hope this helps.

Thanks for being my mom, and for all of the things you’re teaching me every day. I don’t think I could do what you do, I really admire you a lot. I’m glad that I’ll always be your daughter, and I hope that you get better soon. Thanks for understanding.


Photo Credits:
"Colorful" by A.A.Bindawood is licensed under CC BY-ND 2.0
"Mother & Daughter" by zanzibar is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0
"Mom with kid at the doctor." by Greens MPs is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

About the Author Amazing Nation Guest WriterAmazing Nation Guest Writers have submitted their blogs to us in hopes of encouraging others who may have had similar life experiences. They want to share hope and wisdom with every person who read their blogs.  


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