Hard as Nails Ministries
7 Years

7 Years

By:  Karen Pullano October 21, 2020
#AmazingNation, #Strength , #Suffering, #Winning

In these last 7 years, I’ve come to understand that my suffering is a gift. A gift not exactly given to me by God, but allowed by Him so that He might shower me with so many other amazing gifts and graces. In the rawness of my grief, when Mikey had died 12 years ago and when Anna died 7 years ago, God taught me that when you are clawing at air and think you have lost too much to survive, He is there, and He is enough.

He’s proved His Love for me constantly, always keeping every promise. He’s been by my side in the darkest valleys and to the top of the tallest hills.

We’ve walked through fire together, and I would follow Him again anywhere, even to the cross. After all, the cross is where He did His best work, and where I do mine. Mostly because that’s where I meet Him, the one who is Love and Mercy itself. There is no fear at the cross with Jesus, only looking forward to resurrection. Where then can fear live, if the worst case is the cross with our Savior? It’s not death that stings, so much as the fear of death. And the fear of death does not compare to the fear of living without the One who loves me above all else. If that were possible, then everything would sting!

Today I am reminded of all that we have lost in our beautiful and vibrant Daughter, Anna. I am of course mourning once again all her ‘lasts’ and the really empty space in our family. All the “what-ifs” and “should-haves” can bring such great sorrow, but I consider them all a gift because I know they will bring me face to face with the cross. It’s so hard to see those that we love in such agony. He waits there for me anyway. Alone the grief is heavy, but together the sorrow is transformed. I am His, He is mine, and He is enough.

These memories are joy but are also a painful and sorrowful cross...

This is the Cross that heals and redeems.


Photo Credits:
"Along a Scenic Country Road" by ForestWander.com is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0
"Cross-in-Chimayo-Area" by Glen's Pics is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0


About the Author Karen PullanoKaren is a wife, and mom of 10 children. Her reflections on life and parenting come from her blog "Godversations"


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